Reading Time: 2 minutes

Can I talk to you? What if I tell you that I’m lonely and needy? Is it alright to believe that I still have a chance?

My name’s not important. I have many. None suit the person I was or the monster I’ve become.

No. Wait.

Monsters aren’t so bad. At least they don’t hide their ugliness, the darkness that fills them. You say you’re human, I’ll say I’m skeptical. If I tell you the things I’ve done, you won’t want to look at me. You might even try to run.

But please, just listen to me. It’s awful to be all alone. No family, no friends, only blood-curdling memories. They haunt me and I haunt you.


Laugh with me. Show me that you want to be with me. Yes. You can do it. It took me so long to find you. Even broke a tooth and a finger to bring you here.

Hold my hand. It’s not as soft as yours but it’s warmer.

What’s that? Did you say something? I’m listening. Please speak to me.

Look. I’ve got you a present. It’s my grandmother’s necklace. She was the only one who tolerated me.

Here. Allow me. Ahhh. You look so pretty. I want to kiss you. Make you mine.

Come on. Say something. Why won’t you? Don’t stare at me like I’m an idiot.

Do you think I am?

Please save me. I can’t do this again and again.

Hello? Hey there! Are you deaf?!


You won’t talk to me either. I should’ve known better.

You’re just like the rest of them! Unkind! Indecent! DISGUSTING!

I feared you’d be heartless. But I wanted to be sure. When I cut open your chest, your heart was still beating. It looked amazing, so ravishing, a piece of art.

It finally stopped. I was right, it didn’t want me. I’ll bury you next to the others. You won’t feel the least bit lonely.

My loneliness is a curse and not a matter of choice.

Never mind though. I’ll try to find someone again.

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30 Comments on “Not a Matter of Choice – Flash Fiction Story

  1. Oh ho! Perfect read for a lonely Saturday night! Two of the most unsettling words in the English language have to be “No. Wait.” When someone speaks those words to you, it’s time to run. What a disturbing romp this was! Well done, Terveen! 🙂

    • I completely agree, Mike. Those two words can never be followed by anything good. Thanks so much and I hope that you have a ‘settled’ week ahead. Watch out… 🙂

  2. Well, Terveen. You never disappoint. I’m staring at my Sunday morning toast, smothered in raspberry jam, and suddenly, the bright red doesn’t look that appetizing any more. Great story, as per usual! Must learn to read after breakfast!!!

    • Haha! I can see how dicey that jam might have looked. Nothing like blood and gore with morning toast. Yes, please read while not eating. Thanks so much. 🙂

  3. Monsters aren’t so bad. At least they don’t hide their ugliness, the darkness that fills them. You say you’re human, I’ll say I’m skeptical.

    ingeniously true. (outside the context of the story itself, which is so well written!)


  4. That voice in the head when you are alone can be really damn scary, i was imagining, ‘silence of the lambs’ as my eyes ran through those words, uncovering a bit of that monster and the guilt which he had been trying to supress, by occupying his mind with a new victim, or in this case a new lover, brilliant read!!

  5. Love the internal dialog here, the justifications we all make, whether sane or insane. By the way, there doesn’t seem to be much difference between sane and in sane, does there?

    • I think insane is probably a safer bet than sane. Don’t know what’s lurking behind that apparently normal tag. And is there really a normal? I think abnormal is the acceptance of what normal is afraid to face. Thanks so much, Bob. Appreciate it. 🙂

  6. Another haunting tale. I watched a couple of serial killer documentaries, and they are absolutely horrific. There are people who just murder for no purpose other than a satisfaction to a twisted mind. It is frightening. You have such a wonderfully complicated mind and it never ceases to surprise me.

    • Thank you so much, Haoyan. There’s a lot one can learn from documentaries and real life. There’s a monster in each one of us. It just depends how much havoc it is forced to wreak. 🙂

  7. Oh my, the haunting thoughts of what appears to be a serial killer of some kind. You’ve drawn out their darkness and related it to human beingness in a way that is relatable. Meaning, we all have some darkness within us, whether we are aware or not. It’s inside the awareness where choice lives as we navigate our myriad selves. Excellent write, Terveen.

    • Thank you for finding the human aspect to it. Though many may not see it, there’s always something that is relatable, even the tiniest thought or emotion. I agree, Jeff, the choice is what draws the line. Thank you so much! 🙂

      • You’re most welcome, Terveen. It’s always my pleasure. I completely agree. Have a wonderful coming week! 😊

  8. This is incredibly frustrating and embarrassing, having to see pages from my journal posted on the internet. I shared my innermost thoughts and feelings with you in confidence when you presented yourself as a friend and now you torture me by exposing me to the world. I have paid your ransom and still you will not return what rightfully belongs to me.

    The question I want you to ask yourself is: Whos is the bigger monster, the lonely and needy old wretch or the stone-faced sadist who continuously tortures the misbegotten and misunderstood creature?

    Look into your heart, Terveen. Look into your heart.

    • I recognize these words, Rhyan. 🙂
      They are so familiar. Could be deja vu. But I thank you for making me laugh each time. Beware of the stony-faced…

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