I will run away. The idea is cemented in my mind.
No, there’s nothing you can do to make me stay.
If you really cared, this act of reconciliation wouldn’t have been so delayed.
You speak of faults and mistakes. I think of infinite possibilities and propitious beginnings.
Where will I go? And with whom?
Why do you ask such peculiar questions?
Is running away in pairs more fashionable? When will this redundant concept be buried?
I’d like to smother the doubts and fears that accompany such a bold decision. Press down hard upon them till they gasp, sputter, and relinquish their oppressive grip.
There’s only room for one on this quest of self-revelation.
That’s how I see it. I am not running from but running towards. It’s not an escape but the attainment of the things I have always wished for.
Peace.
Joy.
Acceptance.
You call me a deserter. Now I question you. Who am I leaving behind?
This life is my own. I have come here alone. No one will accompany me when death is upon me.
Father, mother, sister, brother, son, daughter, and many more ambiguities. Thoughtful labels we assign to one another. Their significance only lasts till life is within us.
Then they are gone. Poof. A vanishing act that needs no talent or practice.
Now, out of my way. We could do this all day. My heart is deaf and blind to your pointless chant – Please don’t go.
Save it for the others who will also be leaving. Do you really think I’m the only one?
This is the start of a new revolution. DISCARD and PROCEED.
Now, don’t compare me to an ascetic. They simply wander off in search of enlightenment.
The light already shines bright inside me. It will show me the way. Unlike you, it won’t mislead me.
To hell with you, guilt and regret. You have controlled me for too long. I owe you absolutely nothing.
Bye-bye and good riddance!
She sees what the mirrors show her. They often control her. Those Evil Mirrors have a mind of their own.
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The taste of true freedom, the kind of freedom we need from ourselves is terrifying. It is so good that we hate it – perfect cognitive dissonance.
This archetype I embrace so happily now is about liberation. Yes, it’s about freedom from social norms and familial expectations, but more importantly from the man in the mirror.
You’re powerful in your writing.
Thank you so much! 🙂
I really appreciate your wise analysis.
There’s a lot we weigh ourselves down with. Who is to blame? Why are we unkind to ourselves. Does shifting the focus help?
These are questions we’ve all asked ourselves and have failed at responsibly answering.
Freedom from ourselves is a step in a positive direction.
It takes a lot of courage but then life can be quite demanding.
This is such a liberating story. I was intrigued throughout. Being controlled or manipulated is a sign of a toxic relationship, isn’t it? You have expressed it wonderfully well.
Thank you so much, Vignesh. 🙂
I’m glad you felt the intensity.
As individuals searching for love and compassion, we are the hardest upon ourselves.
We deny ourselves what we desire from others. It’s quite strange.
That’s true. You think deep 🙂
it takes courage and confidence in oneself to break free from the toxic actions and people in our lives
I will run away and break free. its a good read when i feel so pressed down by life’s life
I’m glad you could feel this, Ayieko.
We often forget about ourselves in the pursuit of others. And toxicity only multiplies when we give in to countless demands, and are then branded as incompetent when we don’t match the standards of others.
Take care and stay strong. 🙂
So many great things in this piece. Like “Their significance only lasts till life is within us.” I love when you write in first person. It always feels very deep and raw. Like a fine piece of poetry. It’s a joy to read.
Thank you so much, Tony. 🙂
First person often gets a lot of us riled up.
It’s natural to closely associate with it.
And I did try for a poetic feel.
You always pick up on these tiny nuances.
I told you there’s a ‘writer vibe’ that connects us. Thanks again.
Viva la revolución! 🙂
YES! I love that!
It inspires me to get a sword. Haha.
Thank you so much! 🙂
I keep running. Always.
But there are things that keep me chained, guilt and regret are still useful for judgement, but it’s people we have to stay away from. They cause guilt and give regrets.
I can relate to that big time.
That’s why I try to keep to myself, and for me, words are the best company.
Sounds sad and lame but then what can one do.
People are unreliable.
Thanks Bharath. 🙂
I love this, Terveen.
Up until the end, I was wondering.
“guilt and regret” – guess we should all hold such a monologue every now and then. Guilt and regret are two locks we often lock by ourselves, without realizing. And then throw away the key.
Lovely!
Thank you so much, Patricia. 🙂
I often start with something in mind and then end up some place else. It happens to many writers. I’m sure you know this well.
Yes, guilt and regret. We help create them. And then languish in their shadows. Unfortunate.
Not you, Terveen. You strike me as a strong woman 🙂
That’s the best compliment for me, Pat.
I am. 🙂
Awesome, I think we all vie to be free, liberated, but dont realize its our desire to cling onto things because of societal and outside pressure that we create this imaginary prison. Loved reading this one!
I really like how you convey this, Deepak.
Self-imposed constraints and suffering. We often know no better. But our hearts never stop craving for respite. The mind just needs to listen harder.
Thank you so much! 🙂
absolutely,…true…
Is there a romance to hitting the road, reinventing one’s self and starting over? Certainly.
But, if this is the bog standard method of dealing with difficult or unsatisfying situations and relationships, perhaps the runner is the problem and if that’s the case then the wise old adage, “No matter where you go, there you are” comes into play.
You can run, gingerbread man (gender nonspecific), fast as you can, but the one thing you’ll never be able to outrun is yourself. You’re welcome to try, though.
So, jog on, you freedom footer, just know that the road always leads back to square one, when you can’t be bothered to put down any roots, and that’s really no advancement at all.
I agree Rhyan.
Have to stay put and deal with it. But freedom from one’s own self-imposed prison can be a great start to fighting off the demons. Though they are an army and as they are neither living nor dead, they can be a perpetual pain – you know exactly where.
I think easing off the guilt and regret can make a person stop wishing for the collapse of mankind and beating one’s chest like an ape with nothing to look forward to.
And you know, there are many who won’t let you forget that guilt and regret and will so slyly bring it before you on every possible occasion.
I say plant your feet firmly, let your heart and mind out the door, and leave those sorry jerks sulking, and searching for their next victim.
But then, no one needs to entertain guilt and regret.
Thanks for your wise words of wisdom. They are truly appreciated. 🙂
True, and a good line
“Then they are gone. Poof. A vanishing act that needs no talent or practice”
Important point below Terveen. No need to respond
‘We often forget about ourselves in the pursuit of others. And toxicity only multiplies when we give in to countless demands, and are then branded as incompetent when we don’t match the standards of others’
Thanks so much, Don.
I agree with you. 🙂
Your words scream powerful here. As always. Loved it throughout!
Thanks so much, Simmi. 🙂
I wish we could all be kinder to ourselves. Can’t expect this from anyone else…
You’re most welcome! ♥️
Very interesting post! I had to read it a few times to fully understand it to be honest, but now I think I can relate to it… Sometimes loved ones are limiting us and our dreams, and then you have to decide to stay or leave.
Thank you so much!
It was basically a threat to the guilt and regret that continuously hounds us. And the obvious reasons behind their existence. I think we all need to give ourselves a break because frankly no one else will. 🙂
“That’s how I see it. I am not running from but running towards. It’s not an escape but the attainment of the things I have always wished for.
Peace.
Joy.
Acceptance.
You call me a deserter. Now I question you. Who am I leaving behind?”
“To hell with you, guilt and regret. You have controlled me for too long. I owe you absolutely nothing.”
I love these two. They resonate with me. Keep up the good work, Terveen!
Thank you so much, Tom! Appreciate the support. 🙂
We all feel the depth of these words. Some more than others. Choices often confront us, and some are downright scary and tough.
I’m sure you’ve had to make some yourself. Guilt and regret should never control a person’s thoughts and actions. 🙂
Loved this piece. Your stories are always full of interesting gems, like the ‘propitious beginnings’ or the intriguing question: ‘Is running away in pairs more fashionable?’. Great work.
Thank you so much, Britta. 🙂
You usually mention the parts I like best.
Is there some telepathy working here? Haha.
I appreciate your support and encouragement.
a powerful poem of Defiance; I love the phrase ‘discard and proceed’ ; I felt the rollicking rhythm of freedom —
Thank you so much, John! 🙂
Yes! Discard and Proceed!
Freedom lies ahead!
Wow, what a lovely piece, dear Terveen. You draw so lovingly and, in spots, humorously, as only you can do, upon the reality of the situation for all of us. Concepts indeed, and light already alight inside us, agreed. I love this story. 😊
Thank you so much, Jeff. 🙂
You always mention the humor and I feel highly obliged. It just rises from within like tiny bubbles. Your writing always highlights the light we carry within us. I truly resonate with this.
Take care and stay safe.
You’re most welcome, Terveen. Always. Ah, indeed, that is so true; and thank you, my friend. Have a lovely weekend. 😊
You too, Jeff. 🙂
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Yes, run as fast as you can. And I hope you’ve had good skills to survive the wild wild world outside. If you feel like a slave in a relationship trap, I mean any relationship, the only thing you can do is running away.
Wise words, Haoyan. 🙂
The heart and mind must continue to evolve and find freedom and joy. A relationship should not feel like a trap that forces one to live in discomfort and pain. That’s just not right.
Thank you.
🤗👍
Exactly! Take charge, regain power!